Relationship Therapy, Raleigh NC

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Stop Being a Love Beggar!

As a marriage counselor, I work with couples and individuals who are struggling or want to improve relationships with themselves and their partners. Marriage counseling Wake Forest NC is a safe and confidential place to look within, understand yourself better, and evolve to a place where you feel present, engaged, and happy in your own skin.

Are You a Love Beggar?

In marriage counseling Wake Forest NC, I work with many individuals who feel their partners do not love them. I frequently hear heartbroken people saying things such as, "He doesn't love me anymore." "What can I do to save our relationship?" "How can I make her love me again?"

In desperate need to be loved and accepted, many of my clients do things that seem to cause even more hurt.

However, the truth is that we are all attention and love beggars because most of us grew up with parents or caregivers who did not love us the way that we needed to be loved. Therefore, we expect, demand, or beg our love partners for love and attention as adults because we feel empty inside.

We are grown-ups on the outside, but on the inside, we are little boys and girls who desperately want to be heard, seen, and appreciated.

However, we forget that our partners have their own unhealed childhood wounds and limitations that prevent them from giving us what we need.

Marriage counseling Wake Forest NC can help you understand that we are all humans with limitations and personal issues. Unfortunately, your partner will be unable to provide you with what you require most of the time.

How Can Marriage Counseling Wake Forest NC Help You Stop Being a Love Beggar?

My gift to you and the clients I work with is assistance in learning how to stop begging for attention from another human being and start showering yourself with self-love and self-acceptance instead.

In marriage counseling Wake Forest NC sessions, you can learn how to activate your own inner parent or inner therapist inside yourself, love yourself, and give yourself permission to slow down, stop self-sabotaging yourself, and thrive.

Your need to be loved can turn you into a love beggar who puts other people at the center of your world, demanding attention, love, and recognition. To learn how to love yourself, you need to heal your inner child.

Our inner child stays with us long after we depart from childhood. Psychotherapy can help you work through your childhood experiences and memories that contributed to feelings of insecurity, self-doubt, and hurt.

Because your inner child is your way of being, connecting with that insecure little person can help you process previous painful events, recover, and grow.

You don't need to rely on another inconsistent human being who will disappoint you (because they're only human, right?). What you can do is to take yourself on a journey of self-discovery and personal development. Psychotherapy can help you let go of the feeling that you are not good enough and help you develop a sense of worth, integrity, and joy inside yourself. Then you can tap into this source anytime you need it instead of demanding and begging others to understand and love you.

In marriage counseling Wake Forest NC sessions, I hear people asking their partners, "Do you understand me?" "Do you hear me?" "Do you have my back?" "If you were able to understand that from my point of view, it would be so easy, we would be so happy!"

But it doesn't work like this. And even if it does, we would not be able to sustain it because, sooner or later, we go back to how we are. And there is nothing bad about this. The reality is that it is okay not to see eye to eye as long as people feel content with themselves. Then, they can come together and connect in a deep and meaningful way without needing, wanting, or feeling empty.

Summary

Putting another person at the center of your own life can be scary for them. Marriage counseling Wake Forest NC can help you stop tormenting yourself and your partner with ongoing demands, needs, and wants and learn how to tap into your inner sources and enjoy your life.

I hope this was helpful. If you have any questions or would like to schedule an appointment in my Wake Forest or virtual office, do not hesitate to book your free 15-minute phone consultation online by clicking here.